Monday, December 19, 2011

An ending

My son died on Friday.

It wasn't anybody's fault. He'd had enough pain and distress and chose his own time to go. We had three days at home before he had to go back into hospital - things were hard for us but this time they got it right for him. We stayed with him and were allowed to do the bulk of his care, his own nurses came in and were a massive help.

I don't know where this leaves me yet, and to be honest, it doesn't worry me. For now, all I'm interested in is getting him settled, sorting out his affairs and remembering him - not in that order. We've had some good times going through his photographs and talking about the things we did. And we've cried a lot.

He was a big part of our lives, still is and always will be.


  1. So sorry to hear this, I have followed your blog for a while now. I'm so sorry for your loss, I know these words do not ease your families pain at this time.

    Thank you for allowing me to share through these posts over the last year.
    Katie xxxx

  2. I am so sorry Ned and you are right - he did choose his own time to go.

    Your son is now free of pain and distress and despite the pain of his loss now, he will always be remembered in your heart as your fine courageious son - someone to be proud of.


  3. Oh dear gods....I am so sorry. I...just can't think of anything to say.

  4. I am so desperately sorry. Like Katie has said, it has been an immense privilege to get to know you and your son over the past however-long I've been reading.

    What you did for and with your son in creating an independant life for him is the model I would love to see for all profoundly disabled young adults - I hope you are deeply proud of all you achieved over the years.

    If you're ever in Manchester it would be an honour to meet you.

  5. He was blessed with a courageous father and a loving family. Sorrow for your pain of loss.

  6. Sorry to hear of your loss


  7. I'm so sorry to hear this, Ned and at this time too. My condolences to you and your family.

  8. My thoughts are with all three of you, and there is no need to apologise for the tears. You have all been an inspiration to me...
    Jo xx

  9. A sad day, Ned, but all your readers know your family couldn't have done more. I would like you to know that you have inspired not only those in a similar situation.

    Take care; you can be proud.

  10. Thank you for the support - it is appreciated.

    Not sure yet exactly where I go from here but I'd be betraying my son if I just stopped. There are many more like him out there with no voice, maybe I can help say some of the things they can't.

    There may, however, be a short intermission.

  11. I am so sorry to hear about your son, and have been away from blogging for a while, so have just come upon your post. My thoughts are with you all. Ellen Power

  12. Thanks, appreciated.
    Still not sure it's hit us yet fully.