After pestering, cajoling, organizing for them and applying various forms of internal and external pressure, Social Services started by trying to bulldoze our sons review into a cuts exercise. They are now starting to agree that what is needed is not any less, or even any more money, just reallocate it a bit to get the care needed to happen. Some of them now seem to think that this was their idea, and it's in his best interests. I'm perfectly happy to let them take the credit - as long as my son gets the care he needs.
Health are a different matter. Far more intransigent, ruthless and uncaring. Much more interested in getting the boxes ticked, cutting the costs and protecting their own personal backs than having any real interest in our sons care. And far more willing to use their power regardless of the impact it has - even when it is detrimental to the care. Much more hard nosed and uncaring. A different set of strategies needed here - facing them down rather than reasoning is all that gets results. May need to call in the reinforcements here - but they are primed and ready. Public embarrassment and the threat of legal action are a last resort, but ones I'll use if I have to.
It feels like a power game, and I'm sure it is for them. The difference is that I'm willing to lose the game as long as I win the battle for his care. It always surprises me how far from the real care these people are. Winning for them is keeping their egos intact and shutting up a troublesome advocate. Winning for me is getting the care right. If we both win - fine. If they think they've beaten me - fine. The secret is to keep in the front of your mind what you want - don't get sucked into their power game. You can win by ignoring their rules. It's the care that matters, not who thinks they've won.
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